Week 7: Cause inner lowering

I can’t wait to get out into the mission field that way I can write about burning rats, big jumping spiders, crazy investigators, and all the fun stuff. Right now all I can say is that I could not see myself any other place. This is the most worthwhile thing that I have done, and I am not done yet. I am learning things – hopefully everything I learn – that I will carry on into life after. I have never taken so many notes in my life. It is strange, but I am being a bit organized and it is a good thing.

The other day I was reading the Book of Mormon in Tagalog and to my surprise I could understand about 70% of it. Increasing my vocabulary and learning a couple more grammar principles and I am there. At least for reading, so I hope. Speaking and listening is a totally different thing! I have learned the words through flash cards and notebooks so when I see the words it is easy to recognize, but the sound does not process as fast. Even when making sentences, it takes a while and it comes out simple. I am not complaining nor am I saying that I have not learned a lot. On the contrary, it is amazing what I have learned thus far. The mission field will only increase that.

I wish that I could tell you everything that is going on, but I just cannot. There is not enough time. However, I am keeping a journal of my choices and hardest experiences. Writing in a journal has made me realized how much I like writing in a journal. I love it! I don’t do it ever night although I could because I learn and experience new things each day although my schedule is the same each day. Sundays and H-Days are a blessing though (H is for handa or prepare). Today was an exceptional H-Day because the temple opened up again so we could go. I have really grown to love the temple.

In addition, I have been given more opportunities to learn and develop a greater love for my district. It annoys me that it is hard for me to love even people this good. It says more about me than it does them. I am trying to learn from everything; I did not realized how stubborn I am when I need to change myself. Even harder is when you know that something needs to be change, but you just cannot find it. I am looking and there are so many things I need to change and work on the question is “where do I begin?”

Keep praying and don’t worry about me. I am in a great place doing a great thing. I wish I could write more of you, but after everything we have to do on H-Day not much time is left.

Elder Justin Benson